Mar 2, 2009
I would walk up the path to the shop almost every morning to say hello. In at 5 am there wasn’t much of a chance that you wouldn’t find Gord already there, cleaning up his workshop, painting a door, fixing one of the tractors. You knew he was there, he had the morning news playing or perhaps the all oldies station. Humming to himself, tapping his feet.
“Morning my son!” came the chipper and fatherly voice from the back of the shop. “Morning Gord! How’s the day lookin’?” I would reply.
“Incredible, did you hear the birds this morning? Incredible!”
That was Gord, pretty much every day. Until he got sick. After a mis-diagnosis by the local hospital… Hernia they said. He moved to Calgary to be closer to his son. When the pain continued he went to the Alberta hospital. Not a hernia at all, nope. Cancer.
He has battled it for the last three years and we have thought about him often, hoping and praying for him to get better. I hadn’t seen him since he left. Had a couple of telephone calls, a few holiday cards back and forth. Then on Sunday morning came a knock on my door. There he was Gord and his wife. Big hugs all around, so good to see him. We all gathered around the dining room table to catch up. It was great… until… Henni leaned over to me and said, “Gord’s here to say goodbye. The doctors have said he has 6 months.”
SLAM! Wow, what do you say. I just tried to smile and soak up the moment. His smile, making everyone laugh at the table. Henni, wiping away the tears that were forming in her eyes.”
After about a 45 minute visit, I went to show Gord the Dining hall, we renovated it since he left. He said he was so proud of us, of me. He gave me a big hug. Just before he left he said, thank you for letting him be part of YLCC. It meant a lot to him. Then he drove away, tears in both of our eyes.
It’s strange to think… I may never see you again. I felt empty.
Life has a strange way of trying its best to show you its fragility. My dearest friend Laura who is 29 is recovering from her Chemo for Breast Cancer, another example of how life couldn’t care less if you feel you’re to young or to good to be hit by its incredible power. It may not be fair, but it’s life. I was diagnosed in September with progressive MS and that is scary as well, who knows how my life will turn out from this point on. I don’t plan on getting sicker, but I can only do so much. What I do know is that I am getting less and less patient with the petty little problems that people (me included) waste their time and energy on. Complaining about their situation, their cards that they were dealt, the place they live, the way a friend treats them. Here’s the point. YOU can CHANGE anything YOU want.
The new rip in my jeans doesn’t deserve anger, it deserves to be fixed, or patched or perhaps to make some styling seventies jean shorts out of them. People who complain about their weight while eating a sticky bun should stop and look in a mirror. Put it all in perspective. I remember being crushed in high school by a girl who broke my heart, devastated in fact. I was trying to remember her name the other day…. perspective. How much time did I waste being upset? Yes, I know that at the time it was important but that’s because I was unable to put it in perspective!
My daughter was sick last night, she was coughing and hacking. At 2 am she began to cry because she just wanted to fall asleep. I started to get a little frustrated, thinking ‘come on just take a drink of the water I gave you suck it up’... then I thought of it from her perspective. So I got up, talked to her, wiped the tears away, fluffed up her pillow and went to the 24 hours drug store. I purchased some couch medicine and returned to give her a tablespoon of the cherry flavoured concoction… within 30 minutes she was asleep. Thankful, I did my job, I’m her dad. Nothing else matters.
I sat in my bed at 4 am, thinking of Gord and saying good bye. I thought of my life and my kids. I think I need to keep working on putting things in perspective. I need to focus on what’s truly important.
Today could be the day that it all changes. For you as well…
Posted by Stu Saunders in Leadership Family Life Learning and Growing on Mar 2, 2009 at 9:34 am | Permanent Link | Comments (14)
Comment posted on Mar 3, 2009 at 9:29 pm by happydays (YLCC Member)
Stu,
In 1991 someone that I loved, respected and admired with my whole heart told me that they had cancer and did not have much time. A bolt of anger shot through me like nothing I had ever felt. As the years pass by I have come to understand how blessed I was that this person had been in my life at all.
Life is very much like a strand of beautiful precious pearls, each pearl hand picked and strung together, tied at each end to hold everything in place. If somehow this strand breaks, it changes everything about who you are, who you meet and who you lose. Each person is in our lives for a reason, sometimes for a long time and sometimes for a short time. The beauty is what they leave us with. It is evident that Gord has left you with a heart filled with love, hope and the courage to do what you do everyday. He obviously felt the same about your beautiful YLCC….............and needed to see and feel the love, beauty and strength that it has to offer the great leaders of our future.
Thank you for the reminder, that there is more to the ripped jeans, the spilled coffee and all the things that make us forget how fragile life really is.
Comment posted on Mar 4, 2009 at 9:24 am by Trish Thachuk (YLCC Member)
Stu
I will try to keep this pearl of perspective in my day to day life. I know Gord, I know he is simple and sweet. I know that he is a good man and I know that we were so lucky have had him to touch our hearts. Gord has a short time left and he is still dancing. I hope we all do the same. Lets go out for a tea with friends and family and cherish them in our lives. Imagine if we all made this week the week we had to say all of our good byes? Those tears sweetly roll down my face when I think of al of my closest ones and I am greatfull that maybe I do have more time and and greatfull to Gord for showing me this. Thank you Stu for the blog.
Warmth from me heart to you!
Trish
Comment posted on Mar 6, 2009 at 7:51 am by ElizabethB (YLCC Member)
wow stu, you do it to me everytime. all i can say is that i concur with the above mentionned posts. definitely one of your bests for many reasons. Maybe not the way i wanted to start my day…with tears. but then i realize, they are tears of both sadness and hope. A hope that i can take your advice and learn from it. stop wasting my time on things i know will shape me now but will only be a memory down the road. I respect your words with everything i am.
with love,
elizabeth
Comment posted on Mar 11, 2009 at 12:11 pm by Richard Stuart (YLCC Member)
Thank you for sharing. It makes me realize how much more Linger really means every night.
Mm, mm, I’d like to linger
Mm, mm, a little longer
Mm, mm, a little longer here with you
Mm, mm, its such a perfect night
Mm, mm, it doesn’t seem quite right
Mm, mm, that it should be my last with you
Mm, mm, and come December
Mm, mm, I will remember
Mm, mm, our campfire bright and friendships true
Mm, mm, and as the years go by
Mm, mm, I’ll think of you and sigh
Mm, mm, this is goodnight but not goodbye